The “well of reciprocity” is a concept that I learned years ago when I was “coming up through the ranks.” I hope it might be of use to you.
I most often apply the concept of the well of reciprocity to work settings because your relationships with coworkers and bosses are quite different from your family relationships. Though the emotions can feel the same, when we are stressed, frustrated, confused, tired and annoyed, how we talk to our work folks is different from how we talk to our home folk.
Last week, we released a piece Corey wrote about being in the "bardo,” or the term Buddhists use to describe being between two states. Our sense of time and what we consider the “future” has been fundamentally changed this year. How can I think about what my life will look like in a year from now when I don’t even really know what it could look like two weeks from now?
Read MoreI just love helping my kids with their homework. Helping them out with math - or french classes makes me feel like I am really helping them and connecting with them. It also reminds me of how my dad would sit at the kitchen table with me, helping me out on all kinds of topics with limitless patience and understanding. Sometimes going over certain difficult math problems again and again until I finally got it. Something that I am still very grateful for. - Michiel Plakman
Read MoreIn a conversation with Srin Sridharan today during a breakout session of our Reflections Call, I mentioned how I’ve always been more of a writer rather than a speaker. Writing comes much easier to me than openly speaking does. Public speaking is actually one of my worst fears. And it’s most likely because I get caught up in my head and my own ideas and then freeze up or feel myself being pulled into a ridiculous internal tangent. Writing, on the other hand, gives me the time and headspace needed to reflect and collect my thoughts and articulate them how I actually intend. At the end of our conversation, Srin mentioned that writing and journaling could be used as a tool to crystallize one’s thoughts.
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Pip, Brynne, and I had the privilege of sitting down (virtually) with April Tam Smith, founder of PS Kitchen, a few weeks ago to talk to her about the mission of the nonprofit restaurant she founded with her husband, Graham, only a few short years ago. I’ve gotten to know April very well - first through her partnership with Restore NYC and now through the Community for Change - but I love how every time I talk to her, I seem to learn new incredible stories. Whether you have been to PS Kitchen before and know April’s story, or if this is a new name for you, I am sure you’ll take away something new in this podcast (you may or may not learn how Graham proposed to her, and you may or may not want to have a tissue hand). Check it out below!
Read MoreWe’re right in the middle of it. Past the beginning, somewhere before the end. Certainly, the end of things is in sight. Or maybe it isn’t. It’s as though we’re in this strange, nebulous, uncharted, hazy space of uncertainty. Well, at least we can say we’re somewhere in the middle. Somewhere meant to be transitory, not a permanent place to set up camp. We are definitely in a liminal space. That’s a fact... I think.
Read MoreBryan Stevenson, the author of Just Mercy and the founder of the Equal Justice Initiative, has an idea he calls “getting proximate” in order to really understand the experiences of people who are marginalized or who have experienced systemic disadvantages. Stevenson believes that “if you are willing to get closer to people who are suffering, you will find the power to change the world.”
This seems rather intuitive – but it is definitely more challenging than just reading a book like Just Mercy and saying that is enough. I know I have certainly been guilty of that line of thinking at times.
I don’t know Keith Ferrazi.
Many of my “thank yous” go to people I have never met!
His book, “Never Eat Alone,” is the best “community creation – meets – business” books I know. I suspect we are both equally horrified by the manner in which Machiavellian “networking” is the cultural norm in business. Keith provides a spiritual road map for humanity in business. I read the book approximately 17 years ago.
Read More“They won’t remember what you said or what you did but they will remember how they felt in your presence.”
…Maya Angelou
In 2003, I was walking south down Park Avenue side-by-side with my friend Mike Hawley.
He was on my right.
Always buoyant. Always buoyant.
He was super super fun to be around.
It was a sunny day. Probably about 4pm.
I am going to give a tad more background before my “Thank You.” You will see why. Mike was no ordinary man. And yet his game-changing advice for me was so so basic.
Read MoreI jumped in quickly to write a lead in ahead of Amanda because, wow, I found this awesome!
Thank you for this gift, Christina…wow. (And the four Posa sisters continue lighting up the world!)
I have…
...just one COMPLAINT…
…the title…
I would love for the sequel – I want there to be a follow-up or two! - to be titled “Inside My Typical Mind” while this one "Inside My Crazy Mind” suggests that your mind is, in some fashion, many standard deviations away from our own in how it works!
Read MoreIt seems like everybody’s asking us to be patient right now.
We seem to have a very strange relationship with patience. We’re told patience is a virtue – that the ability to calmly wait for something without becoming upset is a trait of a good person.
But we’re also taught that impatience is a motivator to innovation. We applaud the entrepreneurs who invent better ways to do things because they couldn’t accept the inefficient processes required to complete some task.
Read MoreDuring one of the sessions at our annual Sundance gathering a few weeks ago, our friend Rudy Karsan offered up that he has only learned three things in his life. This caught our attention for two reasons. The first - if you know Rudy, you know he is so full with wisdom, and so to hear him say he has only learned a few things in his life made us all say, “wait…what??”
But the second was the #1 thing he learned - to trust his gut. To drill down deeper, Pip and Brynne recorded a podcast with Rudy on what he means by this - what is the gut? What is it made up of? How do you learn to trust it when it comes to making decisions, big and small?
We are sharing the podcast, fully of Rudy’s wisdom, with you below!
Read MoreIn my four-year old's words, it's been really nice to not have to "rush rush rush! in the mornings." (This was also a wakeup call for me to calm down in the mornings when I'm trying to get us out the door...) - Fay Sardjono
Right now I'm really appreciating cooking with my fiance more frequently. It brings me such joy to partner with her in the kitchen as we take turns being the sous chef. She normally travels for work and since she's been home we've had such a great time preparing meals together. That and Wii Tennis! We've been having such fun playing! Some day I'll consistently beat her. LOL! - Richard Uniacke
Read MoreThe other week, you may have seen protests starting to spring up in some parts of the United States. Adults and children marched despite state orders to social distance and remain at home, saying their liberty had been taken away from them because of the restrictions – sometimes drastic – the stop the spread of COVID-19. They were angry because they felt as if too much was being done at the expense of the economy and people’s well-being. I have spoken to people too recently who are angry, even filled with hatred, because they do not feel like our leaders are doing enough.
Read MoreTwelve years ago this year, Coburn Ventures hosted our first Sundance gathering with a group of investors and ‘wildcards’ or uncorrelated thinkers from different industries. The 2020 Sundance gathering was held last week and it looked…a little different. We kept up a lot of traditions though - including a feature mini film from our friend Laton. Around the 5th or 6th Sundance, Pip started tasking Laton with making different video montages connected to different themes like disruption, change, or 'seeing what you can’t actually see.' This year, Pip asked Laton to make a video about anti-pet peeves - and it was too fun not to share with the whole Community for Change.
Read MoreLast Thursday and Friday, I learned, over the course of 24 hours, that schools in NY State are officially closed for the rest of the year, and that my three kids’ 7-week sleepaway summer camp (the highlight of their year) is cancelled.
Within the parameters of us being collectively lucky, safe, and relatively unaffected by this pandemic, this was a huge blow. We now have four more months of trying to keep the kids happy, healthy and cared for, while my wife and I manage our two jobs.
I have to admit, this unmoored me.
Read MoreEarly this morning at about 6:20am, I stopped at a rest area on Interstate 87 while heading down from Saratoga to Pleasantville. I realized two anti-pet-peeves about the now ubiquitous face masks being worn!
Anti-Pet Peeve #1 Putting on my face mask as I headed into the truly gorgeous rest area…
Anti-Pet Peeves #2 Removing my face mask after I left the building as was back near my car…
As I thought of these anti-pet-peeves, I thought, “geez, that’s funny! One joy comes from putting it on and one joy comes from taking it off! Funny??!!”
Read MoreI did my first live Zoom yoga class this morning. Lately, I’ve just been squeezing in small self-practices when I can, or doing a pre-recorded class, but I was craving some social connection, so I decided to seek out a live online class at the studio I used to go to.
After nearly every single yoga class, I always am amazed by the changes I notice in my mind and body. It almost surprises me every time, too. Like, I’ve been practicing for 10 years, how is each time still so new and profound? But, that’s what it is like when working and exploring your own mind and body from a space of curiosity, letting go and conscious breathing: there’s never-ending stuff to discover.
Read MoreAs I was reaching out to collect anti pet peeves for Earth Day, Maria responded with a more extensive list, and I decided to share this wonderfully detailed list with the community! She also used her inspiration to create a little collage to go with it as you'll see below! I hope you enjoy - I am ALL for celebrating Earth Day not just on the 22nd, but everyday :) Thank you for keeping the theme going, Maria!
Read MoreThe hummingbirds in my neighborhood buzzing right past me to get to the feeder right after I've filled it, and the amazing sound their wings make up close. - Alex Knight
I love my soap (Sappo Hill, can be purchased on Amazon) and floss (Eco Dent, can be purchased on Amazon) that are packaged in paper without plastic. AND, ever since I read Joel Salatin’s book (I don’t remember if it was "Folks This Ain’t Normal" or "Everything I Want To Do Is Illegal”), every time I flush a toilet, I think of his fantastical idea of using red wiggler worms to vermicompost human waste instead of flushing our waste down the drain with precious water and grin that he is so radical. - Ann Chung
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