#365: SPOTLIGHT: Lauren Culbertson

Question for Lauren: 

Randy Pausch once wrote that “walls are put in front of us to see how badly we really want something.”  Is there a project in life or work that came with (or comes with) many obstacles (i.e. “walls”) that revealed that your initial intention and excitement was not as strong as you thought it was ?

Lauren's Response: 

This prompt Amanda sent came at a very applicable but vulnerable moment. This year I was up for my first promotion in my professional life, and recently I learned I didn’t get it. 

There were a number of walls I had to navigate to even be considered. Learning the ins-and-outs of working for a large corporation after working for small organizations prior to the last few years. Managing a learning disability. Working with colleagues nearly completely virtually. Despite being someone who can be very self-critical, I really believed I could look back on the last year and say I deserved the recognition. But I still didn’t get it. And it was pretty darn hard to swallow for a while.

Amanda’s prompt says what was something that revealed your intention was not as strong as you thought it was. What this experience revealed to me was actually that my intention - given how strong a reaction I had to the rejection - was even stronger than I thought it was! But it also revealed that some of my intention and excitement was somewhat misplaced.  

At the risk of sounding cliche, there is so much more in my life than work, and I have so much to be thankful for. I am married to my best friend and we have had a great first year of marriage. My life is also lived throughout my hobbies like running, reading, traveling, and nourishing my faith. My family is happy and close by, I have the best of friends. What more does one need?

I saw that while the walls in one area of my life (career) were going to stay high for a little while (you bet I still have the goal of promotion in 2024), if I just turned around, there were hardly any walls at all and there was so much waiting for me there.

Amanda’s thought… 

I suspect Lauren would love all direct responses from you.  I find it incredibly encouraging when I hear from any of you after I share my thoughts. It is powerful for me. I assume many others have a similar experience. So here is Lauren's email… pip

laurenbrooksculberston@gmail.com  

Lauren, your piece was a beautiful reminder for me to pause and "turn around." And what I mean by that is, when facing forward and seeing roadblocks ahead, I always have the option of taking a second to look back at what's behind me, or what I already have with me on my journey. I've been realizing more lately that it's not possible to feel disappointment or anger or fear at the same time as gratitude. Thank you for this reminder Lauren, and for including the awesome picture of you and your best friend. AND Happy Anniversary to you two!

 - AP