#362: SPOTLIGHT: Irwin Kula
SUPER CHANGE! WEEK #5:
I'm sure many of you are likely aware of the new CFC format at this point. We are just five weeks in and I already have a super great feeling about the change as we expect to continue having SO many more voices in the mix now. I really look forward to spotlighting many many more people from this awesome community which seems to grow stronger each week. Happy Tuesday everyone!
- Amanda
Question for Irwin:
There is an idea that we can learn from every single person on the planet. But there are also deeply ingrained habits we have been trained in that “teachers” have a formal designation which might limit our scope for learning. With that thought, does someone come to mind in the past five weeks that you wouldn’t consider a “formal” teacher at all but who you learned something special from… (perhaps even someone you aren’t even fond of) ?
Irwin's Response:
Last week I had one of those lunches we all schedule that when it comes up in our calendar we shrug and ask why we scheduled it. The meeting was with an organizational head, her assistant Matt, and their chief development officer. Too embarrassed to cancel, I went. On the taxi ride to the restaurant, I decided to let go of my dreaded anticipation of being downloaded and make the best of it. The first half hour of the meeting was as I thought it would be. Then out of nowhere the assistant mentioned his hobby was physics and had just listened to a podcast on entanglement theory. (As someone with arrested development in science and math that got my attention.) He explained a little about the concept and asked me how I thought entanglement could be applied to our polarized culture.
Over the next twenty minutes or so we wound up having a remarkable, imaginative conversation about how “we” who see ourselves as “evolved” and “open-minded” might address the present political and cultural polarization. At the risk of being reductionist what emerged from our conversation was that our conventional view is, “If you’re not part of the solution you're part of the problem. But entanglement suggests: “If you’re not part of the problem you can’t be part of the solution.” In other words, no matter how "smart” and even “right” we are, until we see our role in creating the enabling conditions for where we find ourselves, nothing really changes.
Life’s funny. At a meeting I did not want to attend, from the person I least expected to learn - because of my intellectual arrogance - a habit I continue to work on - I actually got a lesson in what I am supposed to be an expert in!
To put it most provocatively and painfully:
If we really are entangled, then the other side is always in some ways a projection of our side.
The "other side" is our dragon, the dark parts of our own psyche - our unprocessed disappointment, sadness, anger, fear, guilt, shame - and until we can enter the cave and own those parts of ourselves --- the fire spewing dragons only grow stronger. And isn't this exactly what has happened over the past few years?
Thank you, Matt.
Amanda’s thought…
I suspect Irwin would love all direct responses from you. I find it incredibly encouraging when I hear from any of you after I share my thoughts. It is powerful for me. I assume many others have a similar experience. So here is Irwin's email… pip
I find it refreshing and exciting to gain new insights when I'm not totally expecting it. So I love this reminder that no matter the situation I am about to walk into, I can always go in with a student-mindset and a determination to learn something new, regardless of who or what it entails. While traveling through Thailand, my sister Christina met a stranger on a bus who said, "Everywhere is my school. Everyone is my teacher." Irwin's story inspires me to think about what can happen when I take on this perspective. I never know what meaningful lesson I may learn or even the bond that could form with another person when a unique shared-interest is discovered. And these things can only be discovered if I remain consistently open and ever-curious. Thank you, Irwin!
- AP
